Monday, June 18, 2012

Top 5 Models I Don't Care to See Anymore

These models are there, staring me in the face, every time I find myself at my place of employment.  It has gotten to the point where my lip literally curls when I see them.  Enjoy...but please don't or you will be subject to a lip curl.

5. Worst haircut award


Whoever let this girl out of the house looking like this should be fired because it looks like a 4 year old cut her hair.  It's either that or she got gum stuck in it right before the shoot and they had to hack it out.  No other explanation is valid for a haircut this terrible.

4. Most likely to win a staring contest award


Do not challenge her to a staring contest--I have and have lost EVERY TIME.  When she's not staring into your soul, she's busy looking intimidating while trying to sell gym clothes.  My suggestion is to just admit defeat and buy whatever she is selling.


3. Best fake pose award





I call them the "Fake Pose Trio" because more staged poses I cannot conceive.  Every time I'm forced to look at this, I find all kinds of wrong with their body language and shudder at the fact that someone thought these poses were good enough to run a GIANT AD of them.

2. Princess of sweat award


She's a little too dewy for my liking. Dewy-ness aside, it looks like she would go as a cat every year for Halloween.  I don't know why but I find it easy to imagine her with whiskers and cat ears.

1. She will kill you award



Her look of disgust suggests that only a dumb-ass would not buy what she is selling.  Ergo, buy whatever it is she's hawking or she WILL kill you--and she won't be merciful.








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